You can't make someone who doesn't love you anymore love you again

Watching figures romance each other on a lighted screen doesn't make anything better.
Neither do late night monologues.

It doesn't make your failed relationship okay.
It doesn't make it okay that you have no idea how to be a father.
It doesn't change your failed friendships.
It doesn't make it okay that you consistently disappoint the people you love.
The fact you have no idea where your life is going.

Neither does the drinks you've had.
Neither does being quiet about how you feel.

Neither does going to bed without saying a word.
Neither does throwing away mementos of a time long passed.
Neither does pretending a kiss or anything else means something to someone who is completely done with you.

Nothing makes any of it okay. You just are. And that's the best you have.
You have to live with it. As little as you want to.